How do I….not be racist? As a writer? As a person?

I'm a grad student attending a university on the east coast, and I am... struggling with my faith in social justice and liberalism in general, just because the things I see people doing don't line up with what they say they're about. I think that some of it is the shock of returning to school during the Trump era, when people are naturally on edge and pessimistic. It might also be the school itself, which is a blue dot the middle of a purple state. Most of the students are white, and straight ...
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How do I keep my parents from coopting my wedding?

Dear Bear,I am in the middle of planning my very queer and very Jewish wedding, our parents are splitting the cost for some context. It is bringing up everything I've avoided addressing with my parents, namely the fact that I'm a person with my own needs and desires, and it is messy and painful. I just got off the phone with my mom. I'm inviting 75 fucking family members. I need to cut back on some second cousins. I told this to my mom and she was basically like, well you know don't you think ...
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My home is unsafe for me to explore my gender. What do I do?

Content note: this question contains short but intense descriptions of emotional abuse by parents. Dear Bear,  A year and a half ago everything seemed to click into place, and I realized how much I hated she/her pronouns and words associated with femininity directed at me. I also remembered how as a child I dreamed of being a dad, rather than a mother, and how jealous of boys I was when I learned what the physical difference between us was. This started me on a journey of self ...
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How do I manage a friend break-up in a small community?

Dear Bear,Is there a way to deal with a friend break-up if the friend just slowly but completely excludes you from their life instead of acknowledging something hurt them and discussing it? I don't know what's going on. This person has not responded to three different attempts (text, email, phone message) to talk about whatever their issue is and I legitimately cannot think of anything. Also there's a shared community involved and it's not a big community and we both work on events within this ...
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We like each other, but is that enough?

Hi Bear!I've known I was bi since I was 16 and fell in love with a girl who was strictly straight and conservative which did not end well, but hey it was life experience despite how hard it was. But because of that, I've been very careful about my heart and who I can open up to. I am 19 and finished my first year of college recently but my friends were extremely pushy about me losing my virginity. One girl in particular was very adamant and took me to get lingerie and bought condoms and all ...
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