August 2016

I KNOW MY BOYFRIEND IS ABUSIVE. WHY CAN’T I LEAVE?

Dear Bear, For the past couple of years, I’ve been in an on/off relationship with an older man. He’s charming, sexy, funny, and clever. On a good day we have such a loving, meaningful connection; we’ve supported each other through hard times, and bonded over our miserable childhoods. I really feel that I love him. But sometimes he is patronising, manipulative, disrespectful, and downright cruel, and I wonder if I even know him at all. The relationship runs in a cycle where we ...
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I DON’T DRINK. SHOULD I START?

Dear Bear, I’m a butch approaching thirty who doesn’t drink and never really has. I’m now feeling conflicted about whether or not I should start. The reasons for my abstinence have been partly situational: I grew up in a family where very little alcohol was around. For a while I had a health condition where alcohol was proscribed. My decision to not drink has also been deliberate: I feel like I have the potential to really struggle with alcohol. My drug use hasn’t been intense, ...
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